"Stuck in the Second Stage" by Kym B. Whitecar
– My warped resentment started after Dad died.
We endured eye rolls and dagger-filled glares as we saw no other option.
Kym B. Whitecar lives in Indian Trail, North Carolina, where she is a member of the Charlotte Writers Club and Charlotte Lit. When she retired from education, she finally had the time to take a creative writing course, reigniting her passion for storytelling. This is her first published work. Currently, she is harassing her friends, family, and critic group with more narrative nonfiction.
Author’s Talk
Kym B. Whtiecar
It had been a year or so after my mother’s passing that the TV show mentioned in my piece aired. Frankly, I was still reeling from the whole experience, not just my mother dying but being her daughter and what I thought that should have been. Relationships are tricky. The easiest barely exist. Dealings with my cashier at the grocery store, a neighbor down the street, or the hairstylist at my local salon are simple because there is no real investment (other than the money exchanged for services). Family interactions are where the rubber meets the road. Parent-child associations are some of the most challenging. Being my first relationship, it made sense that the potholes, construction, and detours would eventually end. Instead, I found myself exhausted by the day-in and day-out maneuvering required of being with someone I loved. Our self-imposed expectations probably had a lot to do with this. There were days when I thought I had clinched it, only to be overturned by our mutually entrenched behaviors (after all, I am my mother’s daughter). Even though I could see the warning signs, I thought time would allow the bond to be repaired, needed words to be spoken, and appreciation to occur. I was left with nowhere to go, surprised that the relationship that caused the greatest consternation was the one I missed the most.
I dedicate this story to my siblings, who traveled the rough road with me and survived to tell the tale. — Kym. B. Whitecar
