"Capers in the Convent and a Sinner's Surprise" by Mary Alice Dixon
– What would Nancy Drew do?
For a sinner, I had a lot of complaints.
Mary Alice Dixon lives in Charlotte, NC, where she is a hospice volunteer, former professor, and happy member of Charlotte Writers Club and Charlotte Lit. She is a Pushcart nominee, Pinesong Award winner, Broad River Review Rash Award in Poetry finalist, and LIT/south fiction finalist. Her work appears in the PSPP anthologies That Southern Thing, Trouble, and Curious Stuff and is in, or forthcoming from, Amethyst Review, Chicken Soup for the Soul, Kakalak, Main Street Rag, moonShine review, Mythic Circle and elsewhere. Mary Alice collects hats, mysteries, and houseplants.
Author’s Talk
Mary Alice Dixon
As Randell Jones says, “Everybody loves a good story.” But for nearly 60 years I was afraid to tell anyone the story of my antics in the nuns’ convent at St. Gabriel’s Catholic Church Grade School in Charlotte, NC. And, to my knowledge, Sister Jean, the principal in both the school and the story, never ratted on me either.
Sister Jean was a formidable woman. A Sister of Mercy. My teacher. In a small two-story four-room-school housing eight grades in 1963. A nun who once climbed a second-floor fire escape, though there was no fire, jumped through a classroom window, wimple flying, landed like an acrobat, shouting “Surprise” at the top of her lungs to her startled students. Of whom I was one.
A woman who spoke her mind. Denied me a coveted spot among the choirs of angels in a Christmas play because, Sister said, “Mary Alice has the worst singing voice of any child of God I’ve ever known.” Instead, I got the role of the Blessed Virgin Mary. Who was to be seen, not heard. Ha. As if. But that’s a story I never minded telling. I mean who doesn’t want to brag about being the Mother of God?
But the story of that long ago time when I made a mess tending the convent during the nuns’ absence? That’s a story I’ve kept to myself. Until now. At first, I was too scared to confess. Later I was too mortified.
When I first began drafting Capers in the Convent I still felt embarrassed about my behavior. But in writing about that experience, I discovered the story is not about me. The story is about Sister Jean. And if they’re handing out halos in heaven, hers is bound to be one of the brightest. — Mary Alice Dixon
